Home Sweet Home

Please "Pimp my Rod"

“Just four more payments and this gorgeous luxury machine is all mine!” Fast Times at Ridgemont High, 1982

I must admit she looks pretty sad, nightmarish one might say, but underneath, a prince. Maybe, the MTV “Pimp my Rod” crew will take on the ultimate challenge, please.

It started off innocent enough…

I answered an ad from individual wanting his 1977 Honda Civic removed from his yard prior to putting his home up for sale. The deal, remove it and it’s yours. Simple enough!

Why? Oh yes, because I have a lovely 1977 Honda Civic in excellent condition that is missing a couple pieces of chrome and a few bits and bobs that are very difficult to locate these days. I’ll throw this next sentence out to build on the momentum of your support for this wise (?) move. I now have a parts car with an engine, transmission, everything under the hood, perfect glass, straight body (sans back hatch), lights, door latches, ignition, console pieces, electric motors and a coveted 70s equalizer.

Getting the car turned out to be more difficult than anticipated, it’s on an island.

1. I injured myself playing racquetball in the morning, without knowing it.

2. The computers crashed nationwide at the company I was renting the tow equipment from and it took a while for an old timer to resurrect the paperwork system.

3. My mom and I made the ferry, she came as co-pilot for free ferry fare (retirement benefit).

4. While on the crossing, my leg and ankle started to spasm and an excruciating pain ensued, making my sweat profusely, want to throw up and I couldn't walk.

5. At the car location, I crawled on my hands and legs with tools, compressor, tow- dolly and with the help of the neighbors got the car on the dolly and off we went. We had 7 minutes to travel 3 miles if we wanted to make the ferry. Our vehicle was the last one to make the boat.

6. Towing a 1977 Chia Pet vehicle drew some looks.

7. Once home, I went to a car wash and 48 quarters later, chunks of garden, branches and moss flying had flown off the car to reveal red. I expected to be evicted from the car wash, but the attendant was understanding and even offered help.

8. Next came the interior. 24 quarters was enough to drain the water, cobwebs, moss and garbage from the interior.

9. I dropped the car off in front of my house and covered it with a tarp. About this time, many of the neighbors decided to walk their dogs and perhaps access how much their property had just dropped in value.

So there it is, waiting for me to cut the roof off and make a convertible, an electric car or perhaps make my own “Cadillac ranch”, but with 1977 Honda civics.

Cadillac Ranch:

www.libertysoftware.be/cml/cadillacranch/ranch/crabtr.htm